With apologies to Dr. Seuss … What to Do If You Own a Drone

By Tom Wood

Do you own a drone?

If so, you are not alone.

Many people and companies already own a drone.

So many that they could fill the ozone,

And buzz overhead with a tone

That might make you moan.

(Way things are going, Amazon may someday own

The skies with futuristic deliveries by drone.)

Now the FAA is alarmed and wants it known

That you must register your drone.

If indeed you already own a drone,

Notify them by Feb. 19, but do not phone.

You can go online or Tweet that you own

A drone, but PLEASE do not telephone.

The five-dollar fee won’t make you groan,

But you need a credit card to certify your drone.

If as a Christmas gift you receive a drone,

It must be registered before it is flown.

But the FAA is throwing you a bone:

It only costs five dollars to register your drone.

But the fee doesn’t go up if you have more than one drone.

Once your drone is registered, you can hone

Your skills as the pilot of a drone.

What happens if you don’t register your drone?

For me, that is a great unknown,

Because I do not and may never own a drone.

But Joan (who reeks of cologne)

Yes, she does own a drone.

She will squeal and a fit may be thrown

When she flies her drone.

Personally, I would rather own

A roan than a drone.

Or spend the $5 on an ice cream cone.

Or pound on a toy xylophone.

Or read about the exploits of Jackson Stone.

Or even have a conversation with my clone.

But that’s another story.